The Great Naruto Bridge
by Insomnia Productions
Summary: Set years in the future, Naruto makes a journey to Wave Country with Sasuke and their teams on a mission that's not quite what any of them expected... (SasuNaru)
1. People Are Strange

The curtain was on fire. 

Sasuke was willing to bet it was all Naruto's fault, mostly because the blonde was much more notorious for stupid acts like this than his students.

For a moment, he contemplated the dancing flames, unsure of what he was supposed to do. He knew he should put it out, perhaps with some sort of jutsu, but his mind had long ago blanked out on what would be good to use against this cheerful little fire. After all, his specialty was _creating_ fire, not putting it out.

The fire was getting vicious now, obviously wanting to explode into something much more spectacular. He was half surprised that it hadn't done that in the first place—curtains were notorious for going up in flames at second-long intervals, but these curtains seemed to be putting up a damn good fight. It didn't look like they would last much longer, though.

Sasuke sighed and looked around the room for something to put the fire out. Clothing would just make the problem worse, same with posters, and the chair would probably have no effect at all. He frowned and grabbed the vase that had been sitting to his left the entire time, and doused the fire out.

Well, that was a lot easier than he thought it was going to be. Scowling, he shoved his hands in his pockets and turned around, stomping out of Inari's room. He should have known the brat would create havoc in the home that wasn't his—didn't he know anything about being a proper guest?

And how the hell did he manage to light the curtains on fire?

**The Great Naruto Bridge**  
Chapter One: People Are Strange  
by Clara

**1.**

"I think I'm catching up to you, boss."

Konohamaru was sitting on top of Inari's bed, legs crossed and hands resting on his knees. He didn't know the kid who owned the room, but had heard a lot about him—the cry-baby, the brat, the kid who wore that tasteless hat. He was also able to deduce some vital information about this Inari kid through his room—he _had_ to be boring. There was one poster on the wall, and a small pile of clothing off to the side, all neatly folded.

Naruto, who was undoubtedly mulling over the same things, turned and frowned at Konohamaru. "Yeah right! What the hell makes you think that?"

"I can control my chakra better," Konohamaru smugly said.

"Oh yeah!" Those were fighting words, if Naruto didn't know any better. "Prove it!"

Konohamaru smiled, then pushed himself to his feet. He pulled a candle out of his back pocket and placed it on Inari's desk, and strolled back to where he had been sitting before. With graceful ease, he flicked a bit of chakra to the candle, lighting it in a small burst of flame.

"I can do that!" insisted Naruto, sitting heavily beside Konohamaru. With an air of concentration, he tried putting out the candle with a wave of chakra.

It exploded.

Balls of flaming wax flew in all directions and mostly went out where they landed, but a couple caught to the curtains and stuck, setting the coarse material on fire. Konohamaru and Naruto stared in horrified wonder at the flames, and then looked at each other for a long moment.

"I think I hear Udon calling," Naruto said. Konohamaru nodded, and they ran out of the room.

**2.**

"Today we're going to Wave Country."

"What for?" Moegi asked, buffing her nails against her shirt. She wasn't too interested in the prospect of leaving for a mission, as her family traveled often.

"You could use the change of pace," Naruto said, idly. Konohamaru and Udon were crouched before Naruto, looking weary and wary.

"Considering the fact that you've had us moving, nonstop, from day one," Udon said in his normally quiet voice, "I think a change of pace would be good."

"I can't believe I'm stuck with _Naruto_." Konohamaru grumbled. He couldn't understand it—they were so close in age! How come Naruto was a _teacher_?

"I've been your team leader forthree years now, Kona. I don't see why you're bitching, still." Naruto folded his arms across his chest and huffed, then grinned. "We're not going on a mission, in any case. I just want to visit some people, and you lot are coming with."

"_Why_?" Moegi growled, putting her hands on her hips. "Can't we _please_ just have a day off?"

"Think of it as a field trip," Naruto said, still grinning.

"I bet you just don't want to go alone," huffed Moegi, glowering.

"That's part of the reason." The grin hadn't left his lips, and it was obvious the smile was pissing the young girl off. Naruto didn't seem to care—in fact, it was apparently amusing him. "In any case, an old friend of mine is coming with us."

Konohamaru perked up. "Don't tell me you've _finally_ gotten on Sakura's good side..!"

"Nope!" Naruto said cheerfully. "Someone a bit more important—well, not that Sakura's not important, or anything. In any case, he and I go back a long way."

"He?" Udon repeated, looking thoughtful. "Shikamaru?"

"As if Ino would let him go for that long. No, someone much more important."

"Iruka?"

"Neji?"

"Hinata?"

"He said _he_, stupid."

"Kakashi?"

"Jiraiya?"

Sasuke fell in step beside Naruto, running his fingers over the designs on his ANBU mask. His expression, per usual, was utterly flat.

"I should have known you would be a team leader for a bunch of brats."

Naruto sighed. "So much for being legends."

"I think they're just stupid."

The team fell silent when they realized they were five instead of four, and stared at Sasuke in surprise. The ANBU stared back, unimpressed.

"How old are they?"

"Sixteen."

"They still act like they're ten."

"Blame their parents, not me." Naruto leaned against the trunk of a large tree, watching the other four stare at each other.

"Why is _he_ coming?" Moegi asked. Her voice was laced with doubt, and Udon was glaring at Sasuke with unbridled revulsion. It was hard to trust someone who was once a hero, but who abandoned Konoha when they needed him the most. Only someone so loved could be so hated.

Konohamaru didn't seem to mind, however. Perhaps he didn't care because Naruto didn't care.

"Because I invited him," Naruto calmly said.

"I'm not going," Moegi snapped.

Naruto sighed and pushed himself from the tree, strolling in front of Moegi. He put his hands in his pockets and leaned down, so that they were eye to eye.

"Listen here." They all did, even Sasuke, when Naruto used that tone of voice. "There will be times you'll be forced to work with people that you hate. You may find yourself having to put trust into someone who had once tried to kill you. It could be that your most trusted ally was also once your most despised enemy. But, as a ninja, you will _never_ put your personal feelings ahead of your mission. That just spells out failure."

Sasuke snorted quietly behind him. It was amazing that Naruto could say that, now, when years ago he committed the same mistakes his students were intent on committing.

"Are your brats coming?" asked Naruto, turning back to Sasuke.

The ANBU shrugged. "They're already waiting at the gate. You're the one who's late."

Naruto grinned.

**3.**

"Konohamaru, Udon, Moegi, you remember Junsuke, Hikaru, Suzumi, right? You were all in Iruka's class together, hn?"

Suzumi, a frighteningly small young lady shrugged. She barely reached Konohamaru's shoulder, even with her copper hair piled atop her head like so. "Yeah, we had class together." Her voice was breathy and sweet, and Naruto could see Konohamaru and Udon fall in love with her at first sight. Moegi huffed and folded her arms over her chest.

"She's like a female version of you," Naruto murmured to Sasuke, and the ANBU rolled his eyes. Without answering, Sasuke shoved his hands in his pockets, and started down a trail they had taken so long ago.

"You didn't tell them just why we were going to Wave Country, did you?"

"I said I needed a vacation." Naruto grinned slightly. "I don't think they would have agreed to a job like this one."

"I'm surprised _we_ did."

Naruto grinned and folded his hands behind his head, continuing forward. "No you're not. Wave Country is important to both of us, and we would have accepted this job offer even if they were unable to pay us _period_."

The blonde fell silent, then frowned. His skin was crawling and tingling, and felt remarkably warm. It was almost as if the kyuubi was rubbing against his cage, like a large cat marking its territory. He didn't want to know how he knew the fox was doing this. Annoyed, he whirled around and met eyes with Junsuke, and the young man looked surprised.

"Sasuke," Naruto growled. "You didn't tell me one of your brats could talk to demons."

Sasuke looked as startled as he could, which actually merely constituted of him raising his eyebrows. "I didn't think you would notice."

"He tried to talk to the kyuubi."

Sasuke sighed and fell back to clock the back of the boy's head. "Idiot."

"I-I didn't realize he had such a powerful demon in him," Junsuke stuttered, quietly. His teammates were watching now, with slight worry. It seemed the other two were violently protective of Junsuke, despite the young man's appearances. Junsuke looked as if he could easily take care of himself.

"Cool!" Konohamaru shouted, and Junsuke jumped slightly. "Did it say anything interesting? I thought only Naruto could talk to the kyuubi!"

Junsuke blushed and edged beside Hikaru, looking faintly embarrassed. "I...I wasn't able to talk to him."

"Anyway," Naruto grumbled, turning back around and resuming their trek. He left the kids a suitable distance behind him, not too far, but not too close. Sasuke fell in step beside him, twirling a kunai idly on a finger. "What else can your brats do?"

"Suzumi's technique has to do with hypnosis, and Hikaru specializes in chakra bombs."

"Mine are better."

Sasuke snorted, pushing his kunai back into its proper place. "Oh, yeah? I've heard about them. Konohamaru seduces his enemies, and Udon's like a tax official gone to hell. Moegi's the only one with real talent, so I hear."

Naruto sniffed in disdain. "Well, you heard wrong." He didn't elaborate, at a risk of degrading himself, and Sasuke didn't bother to answer Naruto's defense.

"Are we _walking_ all the way to Wave Country?" Moegi complained loudly, from the rear, and Naruto pressed his fingers to his temples. "My feet are starting to hurt! Couldn't we have rented a carriage?"

"What do we look like, that we're made out of money?" Naruto called back. "We're not walking to Wave Country, I don't even think that's possible. We're taking a boat."

"Like one of those neat steam-powered ones?" Konohamaru added, excitedly.

"No, more like a 'put-put' boat."

"Real mature, Naruto," Sasuke ribbed, and Naruto sighed. It was going to be a long journey.

**4.**

"I think I'm going to be sick."

"Don't you dare puke on me, Hikaru!"

The boat went 'put-put-put'. In circles. Naruto was steering.

**5.**

When they finally reached solid land, not one of the students wasn't a faint green color. Even the most apathetic ones, such as Suzumi, wobbled and swayed as if they were drunk. Sasuke and Naruto, however, merely stepped off the boat and stretched.

"You ruined my team," Sasuke said, putting his hands on his hips and looking down at his three groaning students. Naruto peaked at them from over his old friend's shoulder and shrugged.

"Think of it as an experience to toughen them up."

"You could have refrained from doing donuts in the middle of the ocean, stupid."

Grinning cheekily, Naruto started down a well-traveled path towards a home he hadn't seen in a long time. Sasuke kept pace and, whimpering, the students followed after. Junsuke and Hikaru were supporting each other, while Konohamaru and Udon waveringly fought to help Suzumi. Moegi dragged herself behind her two teammates, glaring daggers at the young lady that was stealing all their attention away.

When they entered civilization, crowds of people who were edgily going on with their every day business turned and stared, and whispered to their neighbors.

"There's that Naruto kid!"

"My, he's grown quite a bit!"

"He's quite handsome..."

Naruto stood a little straighter, tilting his head up and walking smugly. His eyes were slit closed, and his grin was as broad as ever. His teammates looked around in surprise, unused to the attention their teacher was getting. Usually, the general population merely ignored him or offered tentative smiles. Never before was he regarded as...a hero.

"Looks like they haven't forgotten," Sasuke murmured as the crowd parted to let them through.

"Gods, this feels great." Naruto basked in the attention, loving it.

"Naruto!" A booming voice shook the crowd, and the already tense students jumped. They were ninjas, used to walking in silence, but it seemed as if everyone here was paying close attention to the sound of their footsteps.

"Old man!" Naruto crowed back, darting towards the voice. Tazuna, a bit more aged but still looking as strong as ever, caught the blonde in a tight hug.

"Look at you! I'd recognize you anywhere, with that dopey grin," Tazuna boomed, then grinned heartily, smacking Naruto on the back. Naruto stumbled a couple of steps forward, grimacing. "I may be old, brat, but I can still kick your butt."

Naruto huffed, but he was all grins. "Where's Inari?" Sasuke and the others were strolling up to Tazuna and Naruto. Surprisingly, Sasuke was wearing a small grin, and he accepted the large hug Tazuna gave him without complaint.

"He's at the bridge," Tazuna said cheerfully. "Keeping the demons at bay. He's devised a new force-field, see—"

"Demons!" Moegi squawked. "I thought you said this was a vacation!"

"Well, it kind of is," Naruto responded, cheerfully. But the glint in his eye told her to keep respectful. "See, we're not exactly getting _paid_ much for it..."

"WHAT!"

"Hm, you told me you were a teacher in that letter you wrote last, but I didn't realize your kids would be as bratty as you are!"

"Skillful brats," Naruto corrected.

"We should have suspected," Moegi ranted, pacing. "Why would Naruto want to go on vacation with Sasuke—"

Konohamaru opened his mouth.

"—_and_ us? It just doesn't make sense!"

Konohamaru shut his mouth, then grinned sheepishly at the dirty look Sasuke was giving him.

"Demons," Junsuke murmured quietly, looking in the direction of the bridge. His eyes cleared completely, the colors of his irises seeping away. "There's a lot. But..."

"But Inari's holding them off right now," Tazuna said, tone serious. "Although most of the villagers are willing to help, they're just no match against demons."

"Are _we_ any match for demons?" Suzumi asked, thoughtfully.

"Of course we are!" Moegi snapped, straightening. The pallor of her face told another story.

"That was a rhetorical question, and besides, you don't know that. Have _you_ ever been up against a demon?"

"If you can't handle it," Tazuna said, catching the students' attentions, "then you're welcome to stay at my house, anyway. I appreciate that you made this journey, but we can't have cowards protecting the village."

The students fell silent, looking abashed. Shame on them for fearing.

"Now, now," Naruto said, "it's all right to be afraid. After all, bravery comes from fear. Anything else is just stupidity."

Sasuke snickered.

"..shut up, Sasuke."

"Come to my house. I'll let you know what's going on, there."

**6.**

"Naruto's name brings a lot of attention from the Underworld, it seems," Tazuna said, adjusting his glasses. Sasuke, Junsuke, Hikaru, Suzumi, Moegi and Udon were all crowded around the table, watching Tazuna intently. Naruto and Konohamaru had disappeared off, somewhere. "Demons of all sizes and ranks have been trying to use The Great Naruto Bridge as a crossway from the Underworld to our world. It's super annoying, and making us lose business."

"That's interesting," Sasuke murmured, furrowing his eyebrows together in thought. "How do you figure they know about the..." He trailed off, unsure of whether or not Tazuna knew, and if he didn't, if it would change the older man's opinion of Naruto.

"..kyuubi?" Tazuna smiled slightly his guests' surprised reactions. "Give me more credit than that. I'm an old man, and the news of the kyuubi isn't exactly what you would call 'small business'. Word gets around, that's how I know about it. That's probably how the demons know about it. Whatever. They got it in their head that because they were once buddy-buddy with kyuubi, they could now use his human's bridge as a transport."

"That's crazy!" Moegi protested.

"I'll have to agree on this one," Udon murmured, quietly. His hands were folded neatly on top of the table. "What they want is completely illogical. Boss isn't the demon."

"Demons don't have to be logical," Tazuna said, logically. "They don't care."

"So our job is to...?" Hikaru asked.

"Fight the demons. Convince them to go back to their world. Whatever you do, just keep them from _our_ world."

They all fell into edgy silence, lost in their own thoughts, and Inari's room exploded.

"Gods!" Hikaru yelped, and Junsuke jumped slightly. Unsurprisingly, Konohamaru came charging down the hall and right out of the house.

"Gotta go bye!"

A moment later, Naruto came tearing after him. Sasuke, having expected this, intercepted and caught him around the middle before he could get too far.

"Naruto."

Naruto flinched and squirmed.

"What did you do?"

"Nothing! It was all the brat's fault!"

Sasuke obviously didn't believe him. With a sigh, he left the room to check the damage, leaving Naruto to grin nervously at Tazuna.

"It's nothing permanent, don't worry!"

**7.**

Konohamaru was lost.

To give the boy some credit, it was the first time he had ever been in that part of the world. Naturally, he knew Konoha like the back of his hand (it helped that he had a map on it sketched there for five years of his life), but anywhere else it was like left was right and right was left. Therefore, while had had originally been heading towards the industrialized part of town, he ended up in a forest.

"...damnit."

Annoyed, he scuffed his feet and thumped back against a large tree.

He would have the luck of getting himself lost in a part of the world he had never even really _heard_ of, except in passing from Naruto.

He also would have the luck of suddenly being eye to eye with a tired looking black haired boy, who was scowling and holding a ward up to his nose.

"Woah, woah! Who the hell are you?" Konohamaru held his hands up in a protective stance, eyes wide. "And why is your hat so damn tacky?"

It clicked.

"Are you _Inari_?"

The boy's eyes narrowed at the comment about his hat, and a moment later Konohamaru found himself immobilized with a ward stuck across his nose.

"Who are you? And how do you know my name?"

Konohamaru wondered how Inari expected him to answer when he couldn't even move his lips. He gave what he hoped was a drab look, even though he had a feeling it was merely a statuesque glare.

"Are you a demon? If you are, I'm getting _really_ tired of dealing with your kind and I'm _really_ willing just to kill you."

Konohamaru continued the statuesque glare.

"Aren't you going to say anything?"

Konohamaru wondered about his sanity.

They stood for a long moment in complete silence, the only sounds being the nature above and around them, Konohamaru quiet because he didn't have a choice and Inari quiet because he seemed to have run out of things to say.

Inari frowned, and reached over to pull the ward off his nose.

Immediately, Konohamaru sagged against the tree, glaring for all he was worth at Inari. "I am _not_ a demon!"

"Prove it," Inari drawled, not seeming the least bit apologetic for warding someone who may not have been an enemy.

"I'm a ninja! Naruto's my teacher!"

Inari's eyes lit up, which was surprising to Konohamaru. The boy didn't look as if he was capable of any emotions. "Naruto's here? Already?"

"Yes," Konohamaru growled, the guilt of accidentally blowing up this boy's room completely vanishing. For all he was concerned, Inari deserved it.

"Will he recognize you?"

"_Yes_, for crying out loud!"

"All right," Inari said, starting in a direction that, to Konohamaru, seemed opposite of the one to his house. Then again, Konohamaru also thought that the town was in this direction, so he reluctantly followed the boy. "But if he doesn't, and you're just a demon trying to trick me, I'm going to kill you."

"Big talk," Konohamaru grunted, shoving his hands in his pockets and slouching. "You couldn't even get me on my knees."

Inari paused and looked at Konohamaru, slowing, letting his eyes trail down his body. He snorted. "..I wouldn't want you on your knees."

It took a moment for that the sink into Konohamaru's head, and when it did, he blushed to the roots of his hair. "I didn't mean it like _that_, you _pervert_!"

**8.**

The girls found themselves left in the kitchen by themselves as the boys surveyed the damage done to Inari's room. Sasuke's voice carried down the hall, angrily chastising Naruto for being so careless in their host's house, and Tazuna was laughing heartily.

Moegi and Suzumi stared at each other.

"Why don't you like me?" Suzumi asked, voice indicating that she was not sure if she should bother caring or not. Moegi seemed to have already gotten it in her head that she didn't like the smaller girl, and Suzumi doubted she could change the other girl's mind if she tried.

Moegi scowled. "I do too like you."

"Very convincing," Suzumi scoffed, folding her arms across her chest. Which, Moegi noted with jealousy, was much more ample than hers. "Are you jealous because the boys like me?"

"No!"

Again Suzumi scoffed. "You are, aren't you? Well, you don't really have to worry about it."

"I'm not worried about it!" She paused and gave Suzumi a sidelong glance. "Why shouldn't I worry?"

"...I'm not interested in boys."

Moegi had nothing to say to that, except a meek, "oh." Immediately, shamed, she deflated. "Um, so, are you saying you're interested in me...?"

"Don't flatter yourself."

Immediately, Moegi straightened. "Hey!"

"Your breasts are far too small."

"_Hey_!"

"And your personality stinks."

"That's quite shallow of you," Moegi snapped, folding her arms over her chest protectively. She _liked_ her chest.

"Now there's a popular misconception. Just because I like girls doesn't mean I can't be picky." Suzumi leaned back against her chair, folding her arms behind her head. "And, for your information, I personally get rather annoyed when girls ask me if, because I like women, I like them. I don't go after heterosexuals because I know I don't have a chance, and to me that would be like lusting over a statue."

Moegi bit her lower lip, feeling more than a little chastised. "I'm sorry..."

"Don't worry about it. Like I said, it's a popular misconception." She grinned suddenly. "I wonder how Konohamaru's going to handle it when people find out _he_ swings."

"Kona's not gay! Come on, he was practically all over you!"

Suzumi grinned. "That's how I know he likes boys."

"What?"

"He seemed infatuated with me, yes, but I saw him making eyes at Junsuke. But Jun's already with Hikaru..."

"Wait, wait. Are you telling me your entire _team_ is gay?"

"Well, I suppose."

"What has Sasuke been _feeding_ you?"

Suzumi laughed, rocking back in her chair. "Cute, very cute. Speaking of, though, I've got a feeling Sasuke has a thing for Naruto..."

And, at that point, Suzumi and Moegi leaned over the table, gossiping while Sasuke and Naruto argued loudly in the other room.

.end chapter one.

Another ongoing fic. Don't ask, I just wanted to go for something more humorous than what Byakko's coming out to be. Also, I always wanted to write a fic with Konohamaru and Inari as primary characters...

Disregard Ebisu for now. I hadn't read up and didn't know he was originally teaching Konohamaru's team.


	2. Breakdown

A/N: Okay, so, haha. It's been ages since I've updated this fic. I'm extremely sorry. I lost interest in Naruto awhile back, but since then have regain said interest. It shouldn't take me, um, this long to update again.

So yeah, this fic is totally an AU now. Or maybe AT? Whoops. For the purpose of this story, Naruto is Konohamaru, Moegi, and Udon's teacher.

ooooo

There were two demons sitting across from each other, playing cards and sipping tea. They looked like perfectly normal human twins; the only thing noticeably different about them from mortals being their abnormally pointed claws and sharp teeth and slits for pupils.

Not to mention their cat ears and tails.

And the fact that they were secluded to the center of the Great Naruto Bridge, unable to move more than twenty feet to the left or to the right. By a force field that was just visually _not there_.

They didn't seem to mind, though. Instead, they chatted amiably while sipping their tea. Their conversation was interesting. They were talking _at_ each other, not _to_ each other. It didn't help that they continuously completed the other's sentence, despite the different topics they were tittering about.

"O' course 'e'll recognize us! We was best buddies, back inna—"

"—day. Can you believe what Oroshi was goin' on about? Yenno, tha' outfit 'e was wearing did _nothin'_ for—"

"—'is eyes. Y'hear they call 'im Naruto now? An' that 'e's in a body o' a mortal? Poor kid, 'e's probably goin' daft. Really, I mean—"

And so on and so forth.

Naruto watched them with his head cocked to the side. He was sitting just outside of the force field, completely in view of the two demons, but they seemed much more interested in their cards than in the blonde sitting just so many feet away from them. The card game they were playing seemed slightly familiar to Naruto, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. Perhaps it was something the kyuubi played, back in the day.

"Y'owe me two gold pieces, mate."

The cat demon to the left perked his ears forward, and suddenly he was frowning. "Y'cheated."

"Y'have no proof!"

"Y'bloody cheater! I oughta knock yer head off."

"How d'ya know?"

"'Coz I been cheatin', too, and you do everything like me."

The first cat demon snarled, then tackled the second. One of them grabbed the other's ears and Naruto cleared his throat. Startled, the cat demons looked up.

"Ichiro!" This was said in unison.

Naruto blinked. "What?"

**The Great Naruto Bridge**  
Chapter Two: Breakdown  
By Clara

**1.**

"This is all _your_ fault."

"How is it my fault?"

"I don't even know where I'm going! You should be leading! Isn't this like the forest near your home? You know this area better!"

Inari stared at Konohamaru in disbelief. He didn't bother to argue that despite similar landmarks, this was definitely not the forest he was used to. He sighed and pulled off his hat to run his fingers through his hair, a habit he picked up from his mother when she was stressed. His mother was always stressed. It was getting worrisome. Her hair was turning gray.

"We don't have time to be arguing right now, Konohamaru. We've got to find a way out of here."

"Naruto-sensei should be able to find us."

"We can't _depend_ on him! Besides, how would he know where to look?"

"He'll know!"

"Konohamaru." Inari took a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Do you realize that we're _in another dimension_?"

Konohamaru looked up at the swirling sky and shrugged. "Put a little more faith in ninjas. They always know how to show up in the nick of time."

**2.**

Naruto was giving Sasuke the silent treatment, something in which Sasuke was eternally grateful for. It was, after all, the only time he got any peace these days.

He was watching the interaction between their two groups of students, and was pleased to see they were finally getting along. Moegi and Suzumi seemed to have gotten over their differences and were gossiping amiably (about the people sitting so near them, too. These girls were gutsy) while Udon was wiping out Hikaru in Go. Junsuke had his head cocked to the side and was listening to something only Naruto seemed to also hear.

"Junsuke," said Naruto, catching the attention of the pale eyed boy. "Is the kyuubi trying to talk to you?"

Junsuke blushed and ducked his head to the side, and Hikaru watched out of the corner of his eye. So intent was the brash boy on his uncomfortable other that he completely missed Udon switching their pieces.

"Yes," Junsuke admitted, biting his lower lip. "But he's too powerful for me to understand."

"Then tell him to shove off," Hikaru cut in, dropping his eyes back to the board. He frowned and concentrated on the pieces, and then looked at Udon and scowled. "Did you just switch the pieces?"

"No," Udon said so flatly that Hikaru had to believe him.

"And did you see Sasuke-sensei check out Naruto-sensei's butt?!" Suzumi squealed.

The room fell silent except for the giggles from Suzumi and Moegi.

Sasuke decided to ignore that, and willed everyone else to, also. He would get his revenge on the girls later.

Naruto looked like he had no idea how to respond to that, so instead he gave Sasuke a meaningful look that practically screamed that the black haired ANBU would catch hell for that, later.

"How exactly does your power work?" Naruto continued, determinedly. He wouldn't let a couple of girls distract him.

"I'm sure you of all people know that demons usually speak in a demonic language, and only switch to human language when they want to bug humans." Junsuke shrugged, seeming to relax a little bit. After all, Hikaru was just a couple of feet nearby and Sasuke was keeping an eye on all of them. He had nothing to worry about, even though Naruto was housing such a powerful, dangerous demon.

"And?" Naruto urged.

"And I can understand both languages." Junsuke locked his fingers together and offered a tiny smile. "To me, I can't even tell the differ—"

"And I _swear_ I saw Naruto-sensei blush when Sasuke-sensei was in the shower! I think he wanted to _join_ him."

Once again, dead silence. Tazuna, who had entered right at that moment, turned around and walked back out. Moments later, they could hear the older man guffaw loudly in the next room.

"Definitely overactive libido," Moegi added, cheerfully.

Sasuke stared at the two girls for a long moment, then pressed his fingers to his eyes and got up. "I'm going to go outside," he grumbled. He had to get out of there before he ended up strangling both the girls.

As soon as the door swung shut behind him, Naruto got up and followed.

"I don't even know what libido _is_," Naruto griped, and the door swung shut behind him as well.

**3.**

Inari was uneasy.

Despite his bravado, the boy walking so close behind him put him slightly on edge. Konohamaru felt nothing like a demon, but there was just something about him that made him nervous. Maybe he was in cahoots with the demons?

"Aren't you even going to ask me my name?"

He certainly thought himself important enough.

Inari grunted.

"I'm Konohamaru," the boy proclaimed.

Now Inari's interest piqued. "'Konoha'? Like where Naruto is from?"

"What are you, obsessed with Naruto-sensei?" Konohamaru huffed. "Yes, it is."

"I'm not obsessed," Inari said, simply. "I just see him like an older brother. I suppose you do, also, since you seem a bit possessive of him."

"Don't compare me with you!"

Apparently, somewhere along the lines, Inari had greatly offended Konohamaru. He wondered if it was around the time he warded him on the nose. That would make sense, wouldn't it? And yet, it was a stupid thing to get all pissy about.

"My _deepest_ apologies."

"And don't be so sarcastic, either!"

Inari rolled his eyes and fell silent. It was obviously impossible to humor this kid once you had already pissed him off.

"Look, I have no idea what's got your panties in a bunch, but—"

"Shh."

Now that was a step too far. Inari spun around, intent on chewing out Konohamaru for being so rude, but faltered when he saw his expression.

"What's wrong?"

The forest was silent, all but a rumbling sound that Inari had missed under his arguing with Konohamaru.

"What's it mean...?" He hated was getting sick of asking so many questions.

"It means we're screwed sideways." And Konohamaru slipped into a ready stance as two purring, pointy eared creatures fell on top of them.

**4.**

"Sasuke! Sasuke, hey, wait up!"

Sasuke grimaced and quickened his pace, shoving his hands in his pockets. It was amazing how quickly he could pick up an old habit that he dropped so many years ago. He tried to distract himself with what a lovely day it was; the trees were green, the grass was green...

"Idiot! Quit running away from me!"

'Running away' meant that Naruto was implying that Sasuke was a coward. But at the same time, it was possible that Naruto was only using such implications in order to get Sasuke riled up. It wouldn't be the first time Naruto resorted to such tactics.

"Come _on_! I'm beginning to think you _are_ attracted to me!"

Yeah right. Like he would be attracted to some idiotic blonde who seemed to think orange was the greatest color in the world. Didn't he know he looked like an overgrown poppy? Sasuke stopped mentally to think about that, then snorted quietly. He _must_ be desperate if he was judging Naruto on his choice of fashion (even if it was very tacky).

"...are you?"

"No," snapped Sasuke, finally. This did not keep him from stomping.

"...are you sure?"

"Yes!" What the hell was this sunflower kid's problem? Oh, great. Now he was a sunflower kid _and_ a poppy. What was he, a garden?

"...are you positive?"

"Naruto!" Sasuke whirled around on the boy, eyes flashing. "I am in no way, shape, or form attracted to you! Now shut up!"

There was a long moment of silence in which the two stared at each other, before Sasuke whirled around and returned on his quest to get the hell away from Naruto.

"...really?"

Sasuke was going to strangle him.

"Really." Each letter was punctuated.

"Huh."

Did he sound disbelieving? Whatever. Sasuke continued on his excursion away from Naruto, which was getting harder to do since Naruto was following him.

"I don't believe you."

"I don't care."

"I think you're so madly in love with me that you can't contain yourself."

"Have you been reading Sakura's romance novels again? Back off."

"Sasuke." Naruto said his name in such a genuine voice that Sasuke stopped and turned to face him. "It's okay. I know how hard it is to resist someone as amazing and sexy as me. Don't worry. We'll find you a lovely girl to turn you straight again!"

Sasuke wanted to tear out his hair. Or better yet, Naruto's hair. Gritting his teeth, he stood a little straighter. "Naruto." His voice could chill ice. "I'm going this way." And here he pointed in some random direction. "If you follow me, you will hurt. A lot. Right now, the last thing I want right now is to be around you."

Naruto looked as if he had been slapped. Good. Sasuke turned and trudged in the direction he had pointed off to, ignoring the slight (and very slight it was) guilt that tugged at his belly and listening carefully to make sure Naruto _didn't_ follow him.

He didn't.

**5.**

When Inari woke up, it was to stare eye-to-eye with a horrified looking Konohamaru. And no wonder, since Inari was clinging to him like an overgrown teddy-bear—hips to hips, chest to chest, and the imprint of Konohamaru's shirt still on his cheek. Konohamaru's hands were flat by his sides and he was looking at Inari as if he expected Inari to try and kill him. The idea was more than a little tempting. He reluctantly admitted that the compromising position was most likely the work of the bizarre cat beasts and not Konohamaru's perversity.

Inari may have sprang back a little too quickly. He tried to play it off by brushing the dust from his clothing.

Konohamaru cleared his throat.

"Did it maybe occur to you to try and wake me up?" He refused to let himself blush or get flustered, even as Konohamaru's cheeks flushed pink. He looked at Konohamaru furiously for physically acknowledging that there was something _to_ be embarrassed about.

"I—" Konohamaru started, the pink tinge spreading to his hairline. "You're bleeding."

Inari cursed quietly at him, grabbing the flesh wound that he had been previously unaware of and that now hurt like hell. Deciding that this entire situation was Konohamaru's fault, Inari stalked to the furthest corner of their cell and tucked himself up against the wall.

"Hey," Konohamaru said in a gentle voice. "Let me check that."

Inari ignored him and yanked at the bottom of his shirt. Tearing a strip from the cloth was easier said than done, especially since one of his arms was useless. He even tried using his teeth until Konohamaru took pity on him and ripped a strip from his own shirt. Inari hated how competent that made Konohamaru look comparatively. He thanked him with a glare and clumsily tied a knot over the cut.

"You okay?" Konohamaru asked cautiously.

"Fine," Inari snapped.

All good will faded from Konohamaru's face and he crossed his arms. "Fine," he growled back. Inari was exasperated.

"What the hell happened?" He remembered one of the cat-things dropping in front of him, blowing a cloud of green dust into his eyes. After that was blank.

"Well, after you fainted—"

"I did not faint."

"You did."

"They _drugged_ me."

"You fainted like a little wuss."

Inari snarled at him. "Never mind. It's pretty obvious you got your ass kicked."

Konohamaru's smug look dropped. "It was two against one, since you _fainted_."

Inari ignored the jab. "Some ninja you are."

"At least I stayed conscious!"

Inari flung his hands to the air (wincing when his wounded arm protested) and pushed himself to his feet. He circled the room twice, prodding at the walls thoroughly to try and activate a secret door or something. Whenever he reached Konohamaru's side, he glared heatedly. Konohamaru would pick at his nails until Inari was forced to give up that section of the wall and search around him.

"They're not stupid," Konohamaru said peevishly after his second round. "We're most likely trapped in here by some sort of magic."

Giving up, Inari slumped beside him. "I just think it's counterproductive to sit around and do nothing."

"Don't be stupid. It's not as if they'd stick an exit in a prison cell. I mean, common sense, man. 'Oh hey'," Konohamaru pitched his voice to sound like the demons as Inari grew more annoyed. "'I think I'm going to put a secret door activation button right _here_'—" He prodded the wall for punctuation, and it spun around.

Inari blinked as sunlight assaulted his vision. Both he and Konohamaru sat there in confusion for a moment, jostled from the sudden spin. He pushed himself to his feet and looked smugly at Konohamaru.

"See."

Konohamaru stood up. "I don't believe it."

"I told you! Ha! I told you! I'm _right_!"

"Way to be modest!"

"Whatever. You're just jealous that I'm right and you're not."

Konohamaru looked down at him for a moment with an unreadable expression. He made a strange sound and looked away, starting forward. Inari blinked. "You're weird," Konohamaru said.

Inari scowled, taken down a notch. His mood soured immediately. "I don't like you."

Konohamaru shot a glare over his shoulder. "_Really_."

"Yeah. _Really_."

"See, and here I thought I was the great love of your life."

"Maybe if—" Inari pretended to think for a moment. "Nope. Never."

"You know, you're not exactly a great catch either," Konohamaru grumbled. "Let's try to find our way to the bridge."

Inari looked towards the distance and hesitated. "Well. Lead the way."

The forest looked completely normal—in fact, it seemed like an exact replica of the forest near the Naruto bridge. The only thing really ominous about the scenery was the swirling orange and red that stood in place for a sky. Great beasts with humongous wings flew overhead. The nature Inari was used to was replaced with strange screeches and cries.

Konohamaru sighed. "Okay. Just stay close, all right?"

"Don't worry. As annoying as you are, I think you're the only creature here who doesn't want to kill me." Inari paused. "Or at least, the only one who wouldn't actually try to kill me."

Konohamaru raised his eyebrows.

"At least, I don't think—" Inari tried to step forward, but stumbled as a sudden wave of dizziness hit him so hard his vision fuzzed out. Konohamaru leapt forward in surprise, catching Inari before he fell. Inari's vision snapped back to clarity, and he turned angry eyes towards Konohamaru.

"What do you think you're doing?"

Konohamaru pulled his hands back as if burned. "You looked like you were going to fall."

"I'm fine. Just a little dizzy." At Konohamaru's skeptical look, he shrugged. "I guess I didn't do to well with the transition from the normal world to...this world."

Konohamaru didn't look pleased and Inari rolled his eyes. "Come on, Konohamaru. Let's just go. The quicker we get out of this place, the better."

**6.**

When Naruto returned to Tazuna's house, the girls opened their mouths to continue teasing him. When they saw his expression, they closed their mouths again.

"Naruto-sensei?" Moegi tried hesitantly. "Are you okay?"

Naruto glared sulkily at them.

"Wait," Suzumi said slowly. "You didn't really, um."

"Didn't really _what_, Suzumi," Naruto grumped.

"You didn't really like Sasuke, did you?"

"No. _No._ No."

"Okay, okay!" Moegi waved her hands placating. She glanced at Suzumi and raised her eyebrows.

"I saw that!" Naruto snapped. "Go run twenty laps around Tazuna's house!"

Moegi rolled her eyes. "Naruto-sensei."

"Go. Go, go, go! No, wait." He frowned. "Where's Konohamaru? He needs to run those laps with you for running away like a little coward."

Moegi frowned. "He isn't with you?"

Junsuke poked his head from the entrance. "Naruto-sensei? I think we have a problem."

Inside the house, the lot of the crowded around the table, only missing Sasuke, Konohamaru and Inari. Naruto still looked sulky, but he folded his arms on the table and fixed a penetrating gaze on Junsuke. "Well? Go ahead."

Junsuke fidgeted. "The demons have been acting up lately."

"Well, that is the reason why you're here," Tazuna said. Junsuke blushed and Naruto kicked Tazuna's shin under the table. "Ow!"

"I mean, I can hear them, right?" He closed his eyes and looked frustrated. "Okay, look. Konohamaru and Inari have been kidnapped for ransom. They want Naruto."

Naruto decided his day couldn't get any worse. He pressed his fingers against his eyes. "This really sucks." He stood up. "All right, guys. Looks like we're gonna make an impromptu trip to the bridge." He couldn't bring himself to call it the Naruto Bridge, let alone the _Great_ Naruto Bridge. It was just too weird.

The students looked at each other a bit nervously, before shrugging and standing up.

"All right," Hikaru said. "Let's go."

**7.**

"Inari," Konohamaru grumbled. "You are _totally_ slacking."

"Shut up."

In truth, Inari was having trouble breathing. It was harder to inhale than it was to exhale and he wasn't getting nearly enough oxygen. His vision kept swimming and his limbs felt heavier than normal. But he remained quiet and trudged along. He had at first tried to convince himself that the demon world was just impossible for human's to adapt to, but Konohamaru looked fine and fit. He told himself that it was because Konohamaru was a ninja, but that didn't fly either because it wasn't like Inari was completely helpless.

The last option was the most frightening.

That cloud of green dust the cat-demons had used to knock him out could potentially be something much more potent than just a drug. He assumed Konohamaru hadn't inhaled any of it and that was why he was perfectly fine. So that meant if Inari didn't get murdered by a hungry demon, he would die a slow and painful death by a strange poison that was cutting off his air and making him dizzy and nauseated.

When Inari fell even further behind, Konohamaru turned to him in frustration. "Did you want to take a break, or something? I mean, if it's _so_ hard for you to walk—"

It certainly was hard for Inari to walk, and he proved this quite beautifully by collapsing. The last thing he heard over his labored breathing was Konohamaru's startled yells, and the last thing he felt were strong arms encircling him.

_end chapter two_


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